Thursday, March 23, 2006
dots dots dots. alot of random thoughts.
i am lethargic. i am tired. i cant take this anymore. i need to ramble. ramble. and ramble. fiak off u arse. there are many questions in my mind. why cant we lead separate lives. why cant you stop letting her down. why cant you control your temptations. why cant you just shut up. why cant you just mind your own buisness and stop getting influenced. why cant you be more down to earth. and can you stop making us sad. u suck. u totally suck. i am very tired of keeping mum. and i cant make myself face you anymore. needless to say to talk to you face to face. you said what you did is for our interest. but what have you 'achieved' over the years. nothing. but hell. troubles. cant you just give her a break. can you stop making her cry and stop the suffering. i want her to be happy. i am trying hard not to disappoint her. very hard. very hard. i am tired. really am. i need a break. i really do. how much i yearn to go back time where we were once happy. its all cos of you. ever since the day that incident happened, u made life miserable for us. we have lost trust and faith in you. i am totally hopeless now. i hate you for making life so miserable. i want nothing. i dont want to be rich. i dont want fortune. i want nothing else but a stable life. and a happy one. i wanna sleep. sleeping is the only resort that i can forget everything thats unhappy, temporarily. i am keeping up a brave front. for her. for my own life. hey thanks for everything that you have done for me. it just aches my heart when i see you sad. hang on. be strong yea. we can make it. Deep breath. i felt much better now(: if anyone happens to read this. i am so sorry that theres nothing interesting abt it and sorry for the trouble cos u gna bear with me for awhile kays. YES. i have finally plucked up the courage to get rid of this burden which had been hidden deep in my heart for a couple of years. it feels great to just ramble everything out. i feel lighter! haha. kays. i need a good night sleep and hopefully tmr will be a better day (:
